College Preparatory Physics

PROFESSOR KINGSFIELD'S SPEECH (Slightly modified!)

The study of physics is something new and unfamiliar to most of you--unlike any other schooling you have gone through before. Here we use the Socratic method: I call on you; I ask you a question; you answer it. Why don't I just give you a lecture? Because through my questions you learn to teach yourselves. By this method of questioning-answering, questioning-answering, we seek to develop in you the ability to analyze that vast complex of facts that constitutes the relationships between matter and energy.

Now, you may think, at times, that you have reached a correct and final answer. I assure you, this is a delusion on your part. You will never reach a final, correct, and ultimate answer. In my classroom, there is always another question; there is always a question to follow your answer. Yes, you are on a treadmill.

My little questions spin the tumblers of your brain. You are on an operating table; my little questions are fingers probing your mind. We do brain surgery here. You teach yourselves physics and I train your minds. You come in here with a skull full of mush, and you leave thinking like a physicist.


FUNKY WINKERBEAN by Tom Batiuk
(Copyright 1979, Field Enterprises, Inc.)

PHYSICS--
Physics is the most grueling kind of work imaginable. You'll have to work like crazy just to keep up, and in the end, you won't have anything to show for it. If you'd rather have something nice to take home at the end of the six weeks, like a broomholder or a doorstop, than [sic] perhaps you'd be better off taking shop.